it was freezing.

i slowly dragged the vital signs machine and hoped the 45 degrees temperature was just my imagination. i came out of my lovely 78 year old patient’s room, with a little smile on my face, because she just told me she was very happy i was her nurse.

it was still freezing.

on to the next patient. listen to lung sounds, check pulses. assess. assess. assess. he said the weather was unbelievable. i agreed. it was 97 degrees outside, but it felt like 110. we both smiled to that. this time i was sure that it was just me. sleeplessness makes that to me. i hallucinate.

no. it was definitely freezing.

“do you KNOW that we are supposed to take vital signs here?” his left eyebrow was on the fifth floor, the right one was left at the lobby. he sounded pissed. i’ll call him michael; because i honestly cannot remember his name no matter how i squeeze my tiny brain. he is one of the PCAs (patient care assistant).

“uh, sorry, i didn’t know” i mumbled. i honestly didn’t. i was floating on this oncology/hematology unit, and i didn’t even bother to ask if i am supposed to take the vitals. how rude of me.

the charge nurse noticed i was putting on my second isolation gown. she thought at first i was THAT scared to be contaminated. when she saw me drink steaming hot, boiled water, and that i was obviously having a weird sort of chills, she realized it was the temperature.

“oh, we just have to deal with it. michael wants it this cold. everybody complains and mess with the thermostat, but he just put it right back to 45-50, ALL the time. we’re tired of playing the up and down game, so we just wear jackets.”

“and oh, WE also do the Intakes and Outputs. just so you know.” michael. he pops up everywhere.

the look of disgust on michael’s face was very unnerving. he flashes it so freely everytime i beat him into answering the call light. thing is, i was not even competing. i thought i was just doing my job.

“I GOT IT!” michael hissed when he saw me stood up to see what my patient needed when the light went off.

well michael, I DON’T get it. i mean, calm down man, i’m not here to take your job away. we were supposed to be a team. do YOU know that? it doesnt matter WHO answers the call light. what matters is that SOMEONE answers it.

coming out of my patient’s room, his face was blank. i read the nonverbal message. he wanted me to shut up. but i thought it was about my patient, so i asked. “what did he need?” a moment of silence. and then, “nothing, I already helped him” he said.

it was freezing, and michael was joyously sipping his iced coffee. if he was menopausing, i could have blamed every attitude he’s got to the mighty hormones. since he wasn’t, and only seemed to be wishing he had the hormones to blame, i kept quiet. opening the linen closet, i found a warm, thick blanket to wrap around my clueless freezing self.