the battle within
she wowed me with her exciting stories. i remember listening to her with my mouth open, thinking she was so awesome. i thought what she was doing was so incredible, that at an early age of five, i decided i wanted to be like her when i grow up.
my eldest sister was just in her last year of nursing school back then. already, she had all those endless, interesting stories. i never got tired of listening to her, and i spent a lot of times imagining myself in that crisp, white dress and that cap. “it is undescribable when you see you have done something to help someone, there is just no way to describe it”, she said. i tried putting myself into her shoes, but i didn’t really understand.
the moment i started doing my clinicals, and had my first encounter with patients, i knew.
i know that this is the place where i want to be, and these are the things that i want to do. the days of white dresses and caps are long gone, but the spirit of nursing is the same, and i had no doubt in my mind that i want it. that human connection after every patient-nurse interaction is indeed indescribable. it is difficult to accurately define the positive effects of all productive experiences, but that fact did not stop me from pursuing it. i know what i want, and i want to be there.
i want to give somebody a bath when they have no strength to do it on their own. i want to hold somebody’s hand, when they loose their balance. i want to listen to somebody who’s scared about their future. i want to listen to somebody who’s terrified about the unknown. i want to sit with somebody who knows the end is near. i may not always know what to do or say, but i know that if they need someone there, i want to be there.
i want to be there, to make a difference.
when i finish a shift and i know that i have been compassionate, it makes me happy. if i have given comfort by cleaning a patient, it satisfies me. in a sense, it completes me, because i know i am here for a reason. i may be an unidenfiable nothing in this immeasurable universe, but at one point in time, when i have done something for my patients and their families, i feel great. i had a dream i will help other people and touch their lives, but always, patients help me see things in a different way, and they end up touching my life. i am often humbled by this.
i am definitely living my dream and i should not complain, but for the past weeks, i have done nothing else.
i am always tired and it’s beginning to annoy me. i am caught in between getting that high of being able to give, and that low of getting sick because my body cannot cope. i have been advised to leave my unit and transfer to a place where there is not much repositioning, lifting, and cleaning up. and for almost three years now, i ignored everyone.
i love my job and i love working with majority of the people i work with. i won’t deny that there are a lot of times that i complain, mostly about my frustrations towards some of us who know nothing about caring or going the extra mile, but that does not mean i want to give up. there are patients and families whose attitude push me to the edge and demand more than the patience i can muster, and i will not be hypocritical about it and say that they warm my heart, because they don’t, but that doesn’t mean i hate what i do.
most of the times, on my way home from work, i have this smile on my face, and my heart is full. in a perfcet world, nothing else should matter. in reality, there is a catch…that kind of joy requires a price. in this case, a painful back, and a battered set of aching legs.
what do you do when are living your heart’s desire, but your body disagrees?
this is THE question. an ever present nagging thought i have ignored for quite a while now. this time, it is getting louder, and i am afraid that pretty soon, ignoring it will not be an option.
i am happy, but worn out. i am fulfilled, but tired. i am a satisfied soul trapped in a complaining, unsatisfied body. should i stop whining? or is my body telling me something?
my work lifts my spirit. my work drains my body. there is a debate, and sadly, each side has a valid point. personally, both are important. what do you do when a part of you contradicts another part of you?
which part do you listen to?


oh my gosh, may, i so wish i could have your job (sometimes, anyway)! i have a stupid suggestion…probly won’t help, but…the hairdressers i know (my daughter being one) say that taking vitamin E helps their legs not hurt…the rest of it, well i don’t know…
Comment by libby — August 18, 2006 @ 11:21 am
i have days where i fight with myself. i’m tired etc…those are the days i shove a chocolate donut down my throat and tell myself to just be thankful i have a job that i like doing.
Comment by kimmyk — August 18, 2006 @ 6:09 pm
That is a beautiful post about the spirit of nursing that lives in our hearts. I agree completely. There are areas of nursing where you can still touch patients and make a difference in their lives, and vice versa, without it being such a strain on your body… have you considered switching to such an area?
Comment by Lisa — August 19, 2006 @ 6:53 pm
If you wear yourself out, then you wont be able to help anyone, yourself included. Take a break for awhile anyway. You can always go back if you change your mind. Do you have RNs that work in the social work department (the title eludes me at the moment)?
At my hosp they get to spend time at the bed side with none of the physical demands.
I can remember my friends sister coming home from work, complaining loudly , it seemed thats all she ever did. Fast forward many years later, Im now a nurse, and I discover that my friends sister was a NURSE , i never realized it at the time. oh well i guess its best i didnt know, I may have missed out on “The tuffest job Ill ever love”
Comment by podunkrn — August 19, 2006 @ 10:30 pm
If you’re burned out have you looked at other related career options such as legal nursing or case management. I don’t know much about these, just an idea. Maybe a long vacation? Good luck.
Comment by lpn dave — August 20, 2006 @ 10:13 am
May, I went through this samne scenerio for years. I always worked on my feet. Lifting, pushing, pulling, tugging, running non-stop for more than 30 years. My legs and back hurt so much. I was only 28 when I was diagnosed with Arthritis. I would not slow down, then in my 30s the sugeries started. Still I kept doing what I loved to do. Finally, it all caught up with me and I ended up on early disability and having total knee replacements.
I say, do what you like May, but do it with all things considered. You have to take care of yourself or soon you won’t be taking care of anyone but you.
Comment by Cathy — August 20, 2006 @ 7:11 pm
such a great post and i feel you on this one. i went through this 2 years ago. i ignored signs as well and finally i made a move. ironically, it has been a wealth of new areas of compassion and satisfaction with my job. and no achy legs or insomia days trying to sleep after 3 nightshifts.
Comment by kt — August 21, 2006 @ 11:40 am
Well said. You’re definitely not whining. It is a constant struggle — the passion of being a healer with the pain of being a healer. Someone told me a long time ago, when you feel like you are no longer making a difference, that’s when you move on. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not telling you what to do. It’s just that I understand what you’re saying and at times I have to reevaluate my life and what path I’m taking.
Comment by Dr. A — August 21, 2006 @ 6:48 pm
There are days when I hate the job, and days when I love it. The good thing about nursing is, when you’re bored with your job, you can move to a different specialty to keep it fresh. Going back to school can also breath new life into your career.
Life is short, so do what makes you happy before you’re too old to do anything at all.
Comment by Mother Jones RN — August 21, 2006 @ 7:40 pm
i think its normal to feel that way. just don’t push yourself too hard. pain is the body’s way of telling us that we need to slow down once in a while
Comment by Rygel — August 22, 2006 @ 8:01 am
hi!
first of all let me thank you for dedicating urself towards the service of mankind.
and regarding the complaint of the body, let me tell u one thing, its not the body who is complaining, its u who is complaining, its ur mind which is actually feeling tired, and its getting tired because u r telling it to feel so! its all a battle within, u keep telling ur mind everyday “i’ve done my best today, yet people don’t appreciate my work, this is not the life i wanted, this is not what i expected” mind is just another listener, but this listener listens silently without any objections and act as per ur wish! it seems funny, but thats the truth, many times when we watch movie or listen to somebody elses story as u said in the begining, we get inspired, we get moved by there story and we feel to get intio their shoes, the same way when we listen to otherside of the story(complaints from others, may be coleagues)we tend to behave just like them.
i’ve got a solution for this:
first identify whom exactly r u mimicking(imitating)
beleive in urself and tell urself that u’ll object to their complaints, if they don’t have any basis for what they r saying
u’ll decide any situation based on logical evidences
will not complain urself as complaining is not at all a solution and instead search for appropriate solution out of the problem(if there is any)
in case ur mind tells u or reminds of some complaints or bad event, u convince ur mind to believe that its just an oppurtunity to giude urself towards ur goal and not a bad event..
hope i’ve suggested a better option for u, but its not at all as easy as it looks in this writing, in fact its the most difficult task, but its never impossible
and last but not least, its a rule that every one who tries to follow this will fail atleast for the first time to fulfill this, but the one who gets up to try agian is the one who succed the way!
never give up!
THE TOUGHEST BATTLE IS WITHIN!!!!!!
ENJOY A HAPPY LIFE
Comment by pallukurla — April 9, 2007 @ 11:00 pm