thought salad
my previous post was gloomy.
you, nice people out there, have no idea what it means to me that people i do not really know personally would actually take time to cheer me up or make me feel better. my thanks to all your words of kindness. it dawned on me that although it sucks to beat oneself up for stupid mistakes, it is equally disturbing to be at the opposite end of the spectrum. you know, when you make a mistake and don’t care one iota about your mistakes’ consequences. i suppose balance is the answer. staying in the middle is the solution. slowly, i will master that craft.
on a totally different matter, but a comment on that same previous post though, lori wanted to know how i got through it (meaning nursing school).
well, this is an interesting question to me. i know those of you who went through something as grueling, not necessarily nursing school, have your own unique story. after i share mine, i’d like to hear your versions.
let me start with a little background. i started taking a premed course initially, because my dad said “it would be good to have a doctor in the family…” he was working here in the US then as an LVN, and thought he had what it financially took to send one child to medical school. after two years, it was revealed to him in a form of a dream that he can’t afford the whole medical school thing.
i quit premed and concentrated on selling charcoal, hoping that business could save me form eternal poverty and starvation. it didn’t really matter that my face was unrecognizable at daytime, and scary at nightime, because of the black make up the charcoal left on my face, i was just glad i had something to do. i remembered i wanted to be a nurse since i was a little girl, but there is no way i can go to nursing school with my charcoal business income.
to make the short story long, an aunt who was working as a nurse here offered to send me to college, on two nonnegotiable condition: that i took up nursing, and that i go to a christian boarding school of her choice.
i don’t know with you, but there is something very intimidating about being sent by somebody else (other than your own parents) to school. i lived in fear. fear that if i mess up my grades, she will just stop paying for my tuition, and then, what will happen to me? selling charcoal was a decent job, but it was not really what i wanted to do for the rest of my life. to me, having this fear constantly nagging in my chest meant that i was not entitled to fail, and i had to do everything within my power to finish nursing school with flying colors.
i had to study, study, study! and that is what you need to do too.
first, know what works for you. do you absorb more inofrmation if you are alone, or when you study with a group? do you learn more if you are listening to soft music, or when it is dark and quiet? do you understand the lectures more if you take notes and study them on your own later? does having an inspiration, real or imagined, motivate you to study more?
although i love reading, nursing textbooks didn’t really excite me. they are thick, heavy, and impersonal. but guess what, i had to read them! i am not an introvert, but i am more productive if i study alone, surrounded by the beauty of nature, and silence. just before dinner, i would go to this secluded place, sit under a tree, and read, read, read. if i had big exams, i would read morning and afternoon one day of the weekend.
there is no way you will not get overwhelmed. the human body is one of the most amazing yet complex things to study. take each day at a time and focus on what you are discussing in your class that day. do not make it your goal to be an expert in anatomy and physiology just because you are tyring to learn about it. the more you study about a certain body mechanism, the more you realize how much more there is to learn.
i must admit i knew more theory when i was a student than now that i have been working for a few years. if you asked me back then why a patient with liver cirrhosis have jaundice and have ascites, i can tell you without flinching, the accurate scientific explanation with confidence that i know exactly what i am talking about. ask me now and i might end up mumbling some crazy sounding words, because really, it is not everyday that i need to explain things in a scientific way. on the other hand, ask me to insert a foley catheter to a 500 pound woman back then, and i might have ended up crying in frustration because there was no way i would be able to pull that off then. now, it would be something i am able to do without much anxiety.
if you are committed to finish something, for whatever motivation or reason, you will. when you finally graduate, you are going to look back and say “i can’t believe it’s over!”
when you start taking care of patients with symptoms you’ve only seen and learned in class before, the nights of reading those boring medical-surgical textbooks, will eventually pay off. then yeah, slowly, it will sink in.
i do not know how this post started with some note of thanks, to a revelation that i was a charcoal dealer about 20 years ago, to how fear have motivated me to study religiously, to giving away some advice like i really have the authority, but that’s how it went.
if you got dizzy trying to make sense of whatever i said, go grab an ice cold diet pepsi, run the can through your forehead, till you feel relieved. when you finally get the chance to drink it, close your eyes and imagine you are in the bahamas, lying in the sand, just watching the water, with brad pitt (or angelina jolie) next to you, depending on who makes your heart beat faster.
when you come back from dreamland, and realize that brad or angelina are nowhere, finish up your diet pepsi, and let’s hear your own stories of how you got through something difficult.


I had wanted to be a nurse after I met the most wonderful pediatrics nurse in a clinic in Frankfurt, Germany. And it was a pretty logical decision. After a kidney transplant at the age of six, I grew very accustomed to hospitals and medical staff. So, highly encouraged by my parents, I went into college, intent on a nursing degree.
However, my mother soon scared me right out of it. See, she had contracted Hepatitis C from blood transfusions she needed after she had me. And then I contracted the antibodies when she gave me her kidney. She convinced me that they would do blood studies, find out I was positive for Hep C and kick me out of the program. So I decided to go into Medical Technology instead.
At the same time, that kidney began to fail. I went through school in a fog of toxins and anemia and, of course, flunked right out. No mercy from the professors, no sympathy from the students, I had failed and I was so ashamed.
I went back to school though, talked to an advisor and decided to pursue any degree I was closest to. And, excitingly enough, I received a second kidney on a dreary day in April, right before finals. I managed to still finish my courses, received relatively high marks for most of the class, and got my degree.
Then I realized that my mother didn’t know what the hell she was talking about with the Hep C scare of hers though now I wonder if there wasn’t just a little divine intervention so that I could take time out to have my transplant before I pursued a course in medicine. But I got my CNA, then I went through LPN school.
I am so glad I had all my wits about me by then because it takes courage, strength, fortitude, a whole lot of hope and optimism, and tenacity to make it through. There was a professor who managed to get students expelled due to a mere conflict of personality and I felt that at times, I stood at the bring as well with her. But things have worked out and I am grateful for everything I learned then.
It’s a hard road to travel even if you don’t have to rely on other people’s organs to get through it. But for some reason, we do it anyways.
Comment by Kit — November 9, 2006 @ 8:11 am
Hey.. I just love reading your blogs and this one got me really smiling. I agree with you, I feel like I am not entitled to fail. I also study alone than be in a group. I love to read and everytime I read those thick impersonal books of nursing, I imagine it to be a novel.
Nursing is my second course. I finished BSBA. In the Philippines, nursing is the in thing but before I dipped my wholeself into it, I tried caregiving just to give me the feel of nursing. And it really got me interested.
Your blogs inspire me to do well in school. And who knows one day I’ll be blogging not as a student anymore but finally an RN..
=)
Comment by mai — November 9, 2006 @ 3:10 pm
How about a fruity frozen alcoholic drink and Richard Gere instead? Diet Pepsi and Brad Pitt just don’t do anything for me
Comment by Lisa — November 9, 2006 @ 7:09 pm
nursing was also not my first choice when i graduated from high school. i initially wanted to take up physical therapy because it was the indemand course in the philippines back in 1994. but maybe, God has a different plan for me that eventually, i decided to go for nursing instead. sometimes, i still do think that maybe, i made a wrong choice, but everytime i see my patients (or relatives of the patient) smile or say thank you, all the regrets vanishes and i tell myself that this is the profession that i belong.
Comment by andre — November 9, 2006 @ 7:11 pm
Thank you for looking at my blog.
Here’s how I get through something difficult (like what you read, for example): I keep breathing. I don’t always want to… but I’ve not yet found a suitable alternative.
And there’s still hope… isn’t there?
Comment by The Curmudgeon — November 10, 2006 @ 10:59 am
Nursing is not my first career by any means, and now that I’ve gone on from my BS to a PhD program I really wonder at times what the heck am I doing? I am constantly studying, reading, doing lit searches, writing, thinking - and then there’s the fact that I still work part-time as a hospice nurse.
What keeps me going is the belief of others in me, and what they have invested in me. I recently received an out-of-the-blue scholarship. I didn’t apply, money came to my program and they decided to give it to me. Their willingness to invest in me in such a tangible way keeps me going even when I am so ready to give up.
I read some people’s comments and realize just how lucky I am — my department (gero) is full of the most amazing, intelligent SUPPORTIVE people. We work together and help each other. I am presenting at a huge, international conference next week (GSA) I’ve been a research assistant on the most fascinating project. I have been learning as I go, and I’m pretty nervous about getting up in front of people. And then the PI (principle investigator) sends me an e-mail that says this: “you are such an important, contributing, strong member of the team. Your questions,ideas, insights have been critical to getting us this far–and will continue to be so.” That keeps me going.
And, if you have a partner/family, you gotta have their support. My lovely wife has been so willing to put up with my situation and cheer me on. It’s not surprising that at my school, at convocation, at the graduates all stand, face the rest of the hall and applaud our families and friends — we know, without them we’d have never succeeded.
Comment by marachne — November 10, 2006 @ 11:21 am
I essentially was an airhead and passed with C’s in a 3 year program back when we wore whites and caps. I became a nurse because I needed to do something and it seemed to fit and I enjoyed making patients feel better. 10 years later I went back for a BSN, I was on the honor roll and had HUGE clue about why I was a nurse - to provide a bit of mercy and kindness to a poor soul in an institution. Almost did a Master’s to teach nursing. I’m now the bread winner with a husband and 3 kiddos. What keeps me going on days when I am physically and mentally exhausted is prayer and knowing the Lord will provide an answer.
Comment by feeling my age — November 10, 2006 @ 9:59 pm
I suppose balance is the answer. staying in the middle is the solution
Comment by Ferdz — November 11, 2006 @ 7:59 pm
I suppose balance is the answer. staying in the middle is the solution.
So true, sometimes we just have to step back a little and see things clearer on a larger perspective.
You remind me of my eldest sister who’s now in Canada. I know how difficult nursing can be as sometimes at night I would wake up and see here crying on our kitchen table with my mom complaining how hard nursing is. Our aunt and uncle were also helping her get through her studies so there were those big expectations from her. Fortunately she got through.
I guess with a little bit perseverance, and especially support from from friends and loved ones, getting through difficult situations can get easier.
Comment by Ferdz — November 11, 2006 @ 8:01 pm
I wondered after reading your blog…this is a new thing for me…if after nursing school you had the same experience as I did: When I graduated from my ADN program, I thought, “I can’t possibly learn another thing. There is no more room in my brain in which to put another fact.” Then, after graduation, when I’d been working in a hospital vent unit and ALTCU for 6 months..I thought, “What the heck did I learn in school?” because I had learned so much more!
Nursing is often a wild ride–but I loved all the last 16 years of it!
Comment by Susan — November 21, 2006 @ 5:06 pm
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