there was music, there was cheering, there was food. to celebrate my award.

obviously, i’m exagerrating.

i was welcomed with big smiles, hugs and congratulations. i did not attend the christmas party last tuesday night, but my name called, and some people saw THE plaque. i decided to stick to  my decision not to go, and went to attend my niece’s tennis banquet instead. there i was, beaming like a proud mother, while stuffing myself with mexican food. it was freezing cold, but when you feel proud, it doesn’t matter. after all, not all members of tehir junior varsity tennis team get a 4.0 GPA, right? go Z!

anyway, i’m digressing. back to the award story. it was an award for being the sexiest NOC shift staff, and although i was expecting it, i can’t believe i got it!

obviously, i’m dreaming. or lying if you’d prefer that.

seriously, it was an award for the staff with Positive Attitude. i will not elaborate on how exactly i got that award, but let me say this without flinching: i totally deserve it! you know why? i paid every possible voter in the unit. yes, 50 bucks each!

i’m totally kidding.

well, i don’t really know why they voted for me, but my guess is that i really do not go to work and say “whew! 11 hours and 59 minutes left till i get to go home!” i really do that on purpose, because (and i know this is the part where you think i must be joking) i go to work not only for the money. i won’t lie by saying i don’t enjoy the pay. money is good, but the benifits that money cannot pay back, really get me going. you can quote me on that, because i really mean it. even if you don’t believe me.

i guess you can send me a t-shirt for christmas, if you really want to spread the love. “i won the miss positive attitude award…and all i get is this crappy plaque.” except of course, that will be completely contradictory. so, stick with the traditional family christmas photo greeting, and start mailing them now. i love collecting them.

one last thing… don’t even think of sending me expensive gifts to celebrate my prestigious award. do something more worthwhile. join me in my campaign to include the “sexiest NOC shift staff” in the award categories next year. i will not discuss it here, but whoever is willing to vote for me, for a little amount of money, email me.

sssshhh. let’s keep it quiet people. geeez.