the edited version:

dear nurse manager,

this may not come as a surprise to you, but i still want to let you know that this is not really working. please, do something. i believe you know how important teamwork is in taking patient care to the highest level. there is no room for teamwork, when there is no team to do the work.

thank you for your time,
may

______________________

the unedited version:

nurse manager,

from the time of the implementation of “1 PCA (patient care assistant) for patient census 22 and above, and no PCA for patient census 21 and below”, most, if not all of the staff have been contemplating on leaving the unit. a few have been on the verge of tears in the middle or beginning of the shift, and in case it escaped you, patient care has been extremely crappy. actually, almost nonexistent.

don’t get me wrong, i still love my job. but believe me, i won’t be a hypocrite and say my back does not hurt. i won’t sugar coat it and say, “i actually did a pretty good job today”, when i know for a fact that my patients are not being turned on time, not being cleaned on time, not being attended to on time, not being given enough time.

what do we have to do to convince you that this is not just all about us and our lazy asses? if you take time to really listen to your staff, there is actually a big percentage of us who truly care about the patients. we are frustrated with the way we neglect some of their needs because we just can’t do it anymore. we go home worn out, not only physically but emotionally. we look back at the past 12 hours of work and we don’t get to experience the satisfaction of making a difference in our patients’ lives because really, there is just too much to do, and not enough energy to do everything.

have you ever felt that way? back in the days when you were not a manager yet? has it been that long, you can’t remember? you know, the days when you know you have done everything, but still, you sort of accomplished nothing? didn’t that feel awful? have you ever gone home and your legs felt like rocks, you wanted to cry? have you?

i won’t go on and on and on, saying exactly the same things. all i’m asking is you go to that meeting, and fight for what you believe in, by saying something about it. i know the big bosses may not like you, but shouldn’t principle be more important than being liked? i mean, aren’t we supposed to be the patients’ advocates? obviously, this situation is affecting your staff, but this is really about the patients. don’t you care about them?

i would like to think you do care about them.  i have that little flicker of hope that you do care about your staff. let me hang on to that belief, so i can continue to believe in what i do. don’t push me over the edge, and make me forget the very reason why i became a nurse.

please. do.something.
now.

__________________

my apologies. it’s just that two weeks of working in this new situation has tested my patience and strength to its limits, it is not funny anymore. the little time we have before or after shift change is spent on discussing what we need to do to get this message accross. everybody is frustrated and tension is very palpable in the unit.

the sad part is, a few staff have already complained formally by writing our nurse manager, but her response is not for us, or the patients’ favor. i have had my taste of rebelling against my superiors back when i was younger and blatantly stupid. i do not want to go there anymore. at this point, there is really no point in letting your voice be heard, when you know that others’ voices were ignored.

so please, bear with the whining. also, understand that this might go on for a while. at least, until i finally convince myself that change, is necessary. and that maybe, the grass is really greener on the other side. who knows, one of these days, when i get really really tired, i will be able to convince myself that i am not THAT old to go through another grueling experience of interviews, orientation, and adjustment. after all, old age doesn’t really erase one’s ability to be flexible, right? 

lastly, here’s hoping that your work is not wearing you down like this, because life is too short. at the end of the day, all that matters is the fact that you have tried to make a difference in another person’s life. the idea that you did not succeed is really irrelevant. it is your intention that truly matters.