THANK YOU all for your comments.

i was surprised the tech allowed the delayed labeling too. i can only assume the reasons she did that were: there was no other specimen or requisition sent, and there was no possibility of a mix up. then, it was a stool sample, and we need to know ASAP if the patient should be isolated based on the result. unlike blood, in which redraw is easy, stool samples are not that easy to come by. our hospital is anally strict with this, and those are the only possible reasons i can think of why the lab personnel allowed the delayed labeling.

anyway, there are two reasons why i wanted to apologize to P.

first of all, the tone in my voice and the implication i might have sent was uncalled for. i remember i said “it’s just common sense”. when i said that, it sounded like i was this larger than life, smarter than everybody else bitch who knew everything. it also implied that she knew nothing about anything.

it sounded that way, but i didn’t mean it that way. i know i am not smarter than everyone else, and i know that P is not stupid. i was in total shock with what she did and implied, i overreacted. i was in shock, because even back home, in the philippines, where there is no such thing as HIPAA, nobody will ever do what she did. but still, i could have said it in a better, unoffending way. i played the scene in my head over and over, and i know now that there are a lot of ways i could have sent the same message through without sounding like a total smart ass. i’m just saying…if i made a mistake like she did, the last thing i want to hear is some condescending coworker rubbing it in like the proverbial little miss perfect.

secondly, P doesn’t have a lot of friends. she might think she has, but in my opinion, everybody just pretty much act professionally. they smile and are nice to her when she is there, but they all say something different when she is gone. i am not excluding myself from this group in general, because there is really something odd about her and the way she handles stress in the workplace.

i can’t count the times she cried in the unit or in the charge nurse’s office for reasons we all consider trivial or just plain pointless. there is a long list of instances in which she argued with physicians and other nurses for reasons that border from down right funny to far out ridiculous. i am not saying that crying or arguing is a total no no, but when someone does it that often, there is a point when it becomes either uncomfortable or even annoying.

i guess what i’m trying to say is that i feel bad for her and i do not want to make her life more difficult. i may not be her friend, but i don’t really want to continue increasing the number of people she might call her enemies. before she gave me report that night, she said: “i CANNOT do this job anymore, i just can’t anymore.”

i was supposed to say some comforting words to her, but i kept quiet because what i really wanted to say was: “if it is getting THAT difficult, maybe you should really leave”. as usual, the wimp that i am, i ended up saying nothing because i was scared she will misunderstand.

anyway, your comments made me realize what i said wasn’t that bad. i am in fact reconsidering my apologies. i will work tonight, and if i see P, i will see what my gut tells me. if i end up apologizing, that can only mean two things.

it could be that i am just one of those typical kiss ass persons whose insecurity drives them to do whatever it takes so that everybody will like them, or at least not hate them.

or….

it could be that i am just one of those peace loving persons who sincerely just want peace.

i’ll cross the bridge when i get there. by that i mean, i will decide which one i am when i get there.

for the meantime, it is 3 in the morning, i should go back to sleep.
why i am wide awake blogging is a post for another day.