the past week was a blur.

it started when the hands free driving law took effect on the first day of the month. i guess i can say it was all downhill from there, but it’s not that bad really. it’s just the whirlwind of beginnings.

first day of school for the kindergarten, first day of preschool for the younger one. although i have resisted the urge to make a really big deal out of it and only ended up bringing my camera, other parents weren’t so successful. aside from the hidden tears, there was an abundance of video cameras rolling.

the thing about milestones is, for women, it is always associated with tears. the kids were both excited and apprehensive to start school, but they were not overly emotional. so unlike their mother. my husband, who shared the same sentiments, looked way cooler because although his voiced cracked when he said “i can’t believe this is real”, (THIS meaning the fact that our sons are not our babies anymore) he still managed to be tear free.

me? well, i was in the corner, drying my tears with the back of my hand, fighting back the ones that threatened to continue to fall. all this drama for something i already knew was coming. even before they were born.

anyway, one thing i have perfected since i got pregnant was the art of worrying about the kids. just like a perfectly paranoid mother, i imagine the worst possible scenarios that are ridiculously insane. for example, when i picked up my eldest on the third day of school, he told me he has a new friend, a girl named tiffany. if my insanity got the better of me, i was gonna forbid him to talk to her again, because who knows? what if? what if she will be the one who will break his heart?

then, he came home yesterday, telling me he has another friend, named nompen. what will he do with my son? will he give him his first cigarette? or drugs? what?

goodness, when it comes to the kids and their future, there is no end to the imagined suffering i inflict on myself by constantly worrying about all kinds of things. especially those that i have no control whatsoever. of all the things i’ve mastered, this is something i can almost have a PhD of. May, doctor of worries.

anyway, when i started this post, i was planning on blogging about the new interns experiences this past week. it’s hard to believe that i barely noticed it is july already. thankfully, the fresh but lost looking interns reminded me that it is july indeed. i guess i’ll just have to talk about them next time.